Investors turn Wall Street’s sell-off into gallows humor

The Nasdaq slid 5.5%, the S&P 500 lost 4.4% and the Dow fell by more than 1,800 points. Nvidia dropped 9.3%, AMD sank 17.3% and the semiconductor index tumbled more than 12%. Concerns that regulation and local opposition could slow data-center construction weighed on AI stocks; higher energy prices and uncertainty about interest rates added to investors’ unease.

Financial blog Zero Hedge described the roughly $2.9 trillion erased from S&P 500 companies’ market value as “almost 3 Elons,” comparing it with Elon Musk’s fortune, which the Bloomberg Billionaires Index put at about $785 billion after the close. By the end of Thursday’s trading, the loss amounted to closer to 3.7 times that figure. Musk responded to a post about Jim Cramer’s reported reassurance over the AI sell-off with a grimacing emoji.

The jokes soon turned to investors’ personal finances. Tech investor Chris Bakke, who has 1.7 million followers on X, wrote: “Can’t tax unrealized gains if they don’t exist.” Another user advised people to panic. Trading platform Gemini posted a video likening the market wipeout to the aftermath of an atomic bomb, while social media users dubbed the Nasdaq a disaster zone, or “Nasdaqistan.”

One post joked that Christmas was cancelled because of the market turmoil. Financial advisor Douglas Boneparth listed beer, whisky, vodka, wine and tequila as ways to forget about his portfolio, while Bryan Johnson recast the market’s sea of red as red-light therapy. The posts offered levity, rather than a remedy, for investors watching their holdings shrink.